Improving Clarity Through Syntax

Medium Language And Composition Syntax

Consider the following excerpt from a fictional narrative:

"The evening air was thick with the scent of blooming jasmine; a warmth enveloped the setting as he walked through the dimly lit streets, his mind racing with thoughts of the past and possibilities of the future."

Which of the following revisions improves the clarity and flow of the sentence by altering the syntax?

The scent of blooming jasmine was thick in the evening air; as he walked through the dimly lit streets, warmth enveloped the setting.

As he walked through the dimly lit streets, warmth enveloped the setting with the scent of blooming jasmine, thick in the evening air.

His mind raced with thoughts of the past and possibilities of the future; the evening air was thick, and blooming jasmine caused warmth.

The evening air was blooming with jasmine’s thick scent, as he walked through the streets, dimly lit, his thoughts racing.

Walking through the dimly lit streets, he was enveloped by warmth and thoughts of the past while the thick scent of jasmine filled the evening air.

Hint

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